You know the saying, “don’t sweat the small stuff”? Well, I’ve been convicted that that’s exactly what I’ve been doing lately.
Not in the sense of letting myself get worked up and ruminating over things that have happened to me. But rather, by allowing myself to be dissatisfied with the things that aren’t happening in my life right now.
My dissatisfaction stems from my intense desire to have an impact on other people’s lives and live out the potential God has planned for me…in the fullest way possible.
I have big dreams about my future and how God may wish to use me.
I have high hopes for how God will use my willingness and dedication to serve Him to have an impact on others in the way He intends.
But today, it feels as if I am so small, with such a small impact. This week, my discouragement has had me doubting whether I’ll ever have a significant impact in peoples’ lives the way my heart desires.
Lately, I’ve fallen victim to discontent around my present circumstances and have allowed a lot of self-doubt to creep in and cloud my thinking.
I desire so badly to have a positive impact in this world and bringing hope and encouragement to others. I so desperately desire to have God use me (and my story) to shine a light into other peoples’ areas of darkness.
But at this point in my story?
It can at times like my life is comprised of only “small things.”
Small audience, small voice, small impact.
Sometimes I feel like the only “big” things presently in my life (outside of God) are my efforts, passions, hopes, and dreams.
Have you ever been there before? Feeling small and insignificant? A small fish in a big ocean filled with much bigger, much more powerful sharks?
This past week in particular, the honest, raw emotions of my heart sounded a lot less like a victorious battle cry proclaiming, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13)…and instead, sounded a lot more like this:
* * * * *
“God, have I misunderstood Your promises to use me to have an impact in others’ lives? I have heard Your promises of liberation and the fact that a ‘super bloom’ harvest season is in my future.
I have heard Your countless reassurances that you will use me to encourage and bring hope to others. Lord, I so desperately want that…more than anything.
But God, I am having sincere doubts. Maybe my expectations of how You intend to use me are skewed…maybe my hopes are too high.
I most certainly don’t feel destined for great things. I feel like I’m trying my best; but no matter how hard I try, my efforts alway come up short or fall flat.
In fact, if I’m completely honest: I feel like I come up short.
It can sometimes feel as if all this effort, all this sowing, all this striving, all this dedication to pursue this path you’ve called me to is yielding little to no impact.
I wonder if I’ll EVER have an impact the way my heart desires. I feel tired, God. From my vantage point today, I can’t see how you will ever use me.
However, I know all things are possible for You. And I also know, it’s not up to me or my own efforts. I release this burden to you, Father. I trust you, Lord; but help my disbelief. Refresh my spirit, Lord. I entrust my future to You.”
* * * * *
Friend, can you relate to my feelings of insignificance and discouragement?
At times, hopelessness and discontent with our current circumstances or perceived “smallness” can cause us to question God’s plans for our lives.
I don’t know about you, but at times, I can feel oh…so…small.
I trust God with all my heart to do what is best for me and to fulfill His promises. He has always come through for me in the past, and I know He will continue to do so in the future. In His way and in His timing.
Yet still, at times during the “middle season”…the season of so much sowing and little to no harvest…I find myself questioning and doubting God’s plans or my abilities at times:
“God, have you forgotten about me? Will my season of breakthrough and harvest ever come?”
“God, I think you made a mistake. I’m nobody. Nobody cares about me, nobody sees me. I think You should choose someone else who’s more significant and popular.”
“God, does all this really matter? Is all this effort really making any kind of effort? How can all these small acts of mine possibly make a significant difference? What’s the point?”
Feeling small and insignificant is incredibly painful and deflating.
Have you ever been there before?
God has been so faithful in reminding me this week, that while I feel discouraged, all is not hopeless. He also reminded me that I don’t need to stay in that place of gloom and despair.
When we find ourselves discouraged in life, rather than buying into our thoughts and feelings, we can instead seek God for guidance and turn to His Word to refresh our spirits.
We can combat our negative feelings and fight deceptive lies by realign our thinking with TRUTH.
For example,
This week, choosing to lean on truth instead of the lies rolling around my head and heart enabled me to persevere through “today” and entrust my “tomorrows” to God.
These truths breathed new life into my spirit and helped me trust God, rather than settling for my doubting mind or discouraged feelings over my current circumstances.
If not today, I’m guessing someday you’ll find yourself “sweating the small stuff” as I did this week. Or combating some kind of other negative feelings or thought patterns that cause you to question your significance in this world.
The next time you’re confronted with questions around your identity, I encourage you to chose to fight against those negative thoughts and feelings by turning to God and His Word for truth.
Be also encouraged by the fact that God knows exactly what He’s doing. You never have to question His plans (for you or this world).
Sometimes our “seasons of small” are required to prepare us for big things ahead.
So then, sow whatever seeds are planted in your life today with great care. Tend to those seeds diligently in faith, knowing that God will bring the intended harvest in your life and others’ in His good timing.
And in the meanwhile, keep this promise close to your heart:
“For whoever has despised the day of small things shall rejoice.”
Zechariah 4:10
If you’re struggling with your current circumstances or questioning your current situation in life, find an extra dose of encouragement in this post: Wherever I Am is Exactly Where I Need to Be.
welcome
I’m a writer, speaker, and coach specialized in the areas of confidence & self-worth, identity & calling, body image, and Christian-based mindsets. I help you retrain your brain, grow in your faith, and build better habits so you can live with confidence and stop letting insecurity & self-doubt rob you of the life you long for.
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