When You Hate Your Body
“Ugh, I’m so disgusting.”
Now, these words didn’t actually escape my lips.
But this harsh, self-degrading, self-shaming accusation was painfully seared into my mind as I caught a glimpse of myself in the bathroom mirror.
Desperate to escape my reflection’s accusations, I quickly jumped into the shower, breathing a sigh of relief once finally outside of its gaze. Well, that is…until I looked down and was once again faced with the reality I had wished to escape.
As shame clenched my neck, I did my best to fight back, attempting to redirect my thoughts to higher truths.
My appearance says nothing about me, I mentally proclaimed. There are much more important things in life. My appearance is the least interesting thing about me.
But it was no use.
Shame’s choke-hold felt much stronger than these truth-claims.
So there I found myself, caught up in a body shame spiral, going nowhere good fast.
Avoidance is Not the Answer
Body shame is incredibly painful and difficult to endure. It makes us feel worthless, defeated, and undesirable.
On top of that, we can even find ourselves piling on additional shame for even caring about how we look.
Shame on you, our Critics scold. You’re being so shallow?! You should know better than this.
Yeah, I know. It blows.
To avoid the suck, it can feel very tempting to try to distract away the pain or avoid the uncomfortable thoughts and feelings we’re having about our bodies.
Well, because real is often painful. And hard. And sometimes we just don’t want to face it.
But the thing is…avoidance is never the answer.
(Trust me, I learned this the hard way).
The truth is, unless
we’re willing to confront
we’ll never overcome them.
What’s best for us in the long run when it comes to body shame (or any kind of shame, for that matter) is to run toward the things that are bothering us and confront those fears.
So then, the next time you find yourself in a body shame spiral, don’t run/hide from or distract/numb away the pain.
Not sure where to start? Allow me to help you out.
3 Tips For When You’re In a Body Shame Spiral
In this video, I discuss:
- What to do to get yourself out of a shame spiral once you’re already in it
- Why it’s important to feel how we actually feel (hint: “I feel fat” is not a feeling)
- How body shame is not your fault and struggling with body image does not mean you’re shallow
- 3 ways to fight back when you hate your body, including: 1) the 80-year-old self test, 2) naming the self-harming nature of body shame, and 3) focusing in on the things you love about yourself (and others) that have nothing to do with appearance
Click on the image below to jump right in.
Wanna start making progress on body confidence?
Here’s a suggestion: take a few moments each day this week to name 3 things you appreciate about your body.
For example, “I am grateful for the ears that allow me to hear the soft breeze through the leaves.” Or, “I’m grateful for my sense of smell that allows me to smell the sweet buttery aroma of my freshly baked croissant.”
Name 3 things each day and give thanks to your body for what it does for you. I suggest even writing those suckers down. There’s such power in naming those things on paper.
Click here to nab a free download of my one-page gratitude journal and start naming those gratefuls!